Are You The Same Person You Were A Decade Ago?

Plus Polenta Caviar Waffles, Work-Life Balance, the Top 27 Best Albums of the Year So Far, Best Things I Ate/Drank/Listened To

Certain things raise goosebumps within you—It can be a great bite of food, a moving scene in a movie, a climactic bridge to your favorite song, or just a riveting story. I was taken aback by this story this week: The scene is 3 A.M. my apartment is adorned with lights, candles, and Frankincense incense cones, a playlist of slow tunes in the background, what I call eternal bliss. 

I am reading about recounting the divergence of personality that predicates our lives. Some of us see ourselves as overgrown children in the best sense— with that gleeful optimism and lust for life that a five-year-old has— embarking bright-eyed and bushy-tailed on the first day of school, then coming home to some ice cream, soccer practice, homework and the love of their parents, only to fall asleep quietly at 10 P.M. Then as adults this is a direct corollary to going to work, then the gym, then home again perched with our significant other or significant pet. Move that time to midnight, and the optimism into lust for the weekend.  We are overgrown children, with bills and mortgages, but still the same person with different priorities and obligations. 

Then there are the other sections of "us" that see our lives in seasons—divisive, critically dissected seasons that each have its ebbs and flows. Are you the same person you were as a child or a different "rebranded" individual? This New Yorker article dissects this with more gracious syntax than I can write, so if you have 30 minutes of time, please read. 

Near 32, I look back to fall days rustling through leaves as a kid in my childhood home, managing conditioned traumas from a divorced household but holding onto memories of going to the library or recreation center with my father, not spending time together, but each of us venturing into our worlds. These days would be a wash, but we would always come home and watch football together, through the Quincy Carters, Vinny Testaverde’s, and Tony Romos of the world. 

Then, these crisp Dallas fall days would quickly turn into 6 p.m. nights laden with pungent smells of Ghormeh Sabzi, "nachos" (ground beef doused in cheese with Doritos), or lasagna, all whilst watching 60 Minutes. As this article states, life was simpler in your younger years and the romanticism we have for these years is nowhere near the memories we have as we age. Now it is in the dead of summer, but such fall memories are replaced with anxieties of bills, no kids (blessing and a curse), but a general feeling of slight impending doom., and that's what adult-hood is. Even as a kid, I would ask my mother, "Are we all gonna live for forever?"— amidst breaking news TV segments like when the US invaded Iraq, and those days left kids of the 9/11 era scared. 

The article then goes on to characterize us as dividers—people who disconnect from seasons of their lives to connectors—who believe everything is related. I am somewhat in between the two, as I am with my personality structure—mostly introverted, but thoroughly extroverted when I am around people with good energy. 

The writer goes on to talk about the predicament of his son. The same deer in the headlights, naive individual growing up, may succumb to life's ebbs and flows at some point, Forks in the road are inevitable, but how will he/she adapt to them? The middle passage hits home. I recently had a conversation with an old friend of over ten years who was very depressed and I stated to him, "Do you ever wonder if it's the same set of rigid people and circumstances in your life that are leading you to being near suicidal?" It's about how you view things putting yourself into new situations and betting on yourself to whether you will thrive or succumb to the perils of life. 

Like a classic Rorschach test, some people view themselves are pure empaths, yoga masters, and pious gods— when someone else can view themselves as some bum drug-addicted scumbag. A person may be clean and living their best life, but to others, they may still be that spitting image from years past. We all change through time, but some people lack the emotional intelligence to know that people change, and friends pass like tumbleweeds in a desert.

But do we all have autonomous control over our lives? Not really. It’s more how you adapt to the punches than the actual punches towards you. Nonetheless, as much as I consider myself a divider, the more I see myself as a continuer as well, as the behaviors that made the kid I was, continue to engulf my personality as an adult.  

The New Yorker piece also profiles a group of brothers who went into politics and racketeering respectively, with the same upbringing. Bringing back the same nature vs. nurture concept, it is easy to see these two as equally the same individuals but with differing dilemmas. Now you may argue the nuances between working in the government and mob bosses, but this is interesting. Some people live episodically in a form of spiritual discipline, harpened by a set of values they hold sacrilege to themselves, while others roam aimlessly. 

We are all our own PR company. The story that we tell ourselves in our head may be different than how our neighbor, our partner, or strangers see us. Yet, it is the story that we tell ourselves in our head that truly matters. I was fat, kind, compassionate, and a far cry from what I look like and feel like today. I have had near-death experiences, friends I thought were blood-brothers to me turned their back on me, have bad addictions, but at the same time, have found solace in fitness, family, and friends and built up self-realization. I find myself in both the two archetypes mentioned in the article and struggle to realize my mortality daily, yet what grounds me is growth, knowing that this small sprout is slowly growing into a thorough-bred Redwood, and recognizing that it may never be linear, but the process is always more positive than negative. 

6 Thangs:

1. On Work-Life Balance:

I like to make fun of Gen Z’ers at times- all in good fun and in jest. I come across these folks daily and their nihilism I connect with, but they sometimes brood into their situations that are more-often bright and sunny, and much better than their counterparts across the world. Still, some of them look sullen, and without life. Whether you like it or not, this group of individuals is front and center the focus of Fortune 500 companies, vying for their marketing dollars. Yes, we millennials are by the wayside, Gen X (laugh), boomers (laugh), this segment, and the incoming Gen Alpha are where marketers are trying to make lifelong customers. By those standards, brands like Prime, Celsius, Zyn, YoungLA, and Stanley Cups will reach NVIDIA-level stock dominance. I kid lol. 

What is interesting about this group of people is how they will not stand for shit. By that I mean comparatively to us millennials, If I may talk as our rightful delegate, our sector will last through a tough job or working condition knowing there are dollar bills at the end. Gen Z however, value work-life balance even more than my generation and are not standing for conditioned ideals and structured values in their job search. Think of it as their Alamo stance— we can bear it like our forefathers and mothers, new generations just don't care, but also don't realize the consequences. 

This article outlines a lot of what I am preaching.

While some careers may sound exciting in theory, the reality of long work hours is simply incompatible with young people wanting to exercise their creative and physical muscle, have time with friends, and live a more “European”- less-grustler healthy life.

Some US colleges are soon set to charge $100,000 a year, so it’s easy to see why having a dream career (or even going to college can feel like a pointless pursuit.

In this piece, subjects changed jobs in April of last year and now can earn up to $500 a day (instead of $20 an hour) on the gig market. However, the problem with the collective detachment from the labor market is that it puts even more of the risk of employment on the worker instead of the employer. That leads to realizations that when you nudge employers into the realization that, when you give workers more autonomy, they’re happier and work harder for you.

We live in a capitalistic society. Not just in the US, but worldwide. When the clock hits 23 (not gonna say 18, because you are given 4-5 years after college), you gotta fend for yourself. Think about it in this sense, you go from being a dumb high schooler making mistakes left and right to a college kid, making mistakes left and right with a safety net and without your parent’s supervision.

Then you get into your 20s, the decade where you essentially are told to find yourself. This is the time to find new jobs, experiment see what works, and go from there. I would have never thought about personal training or writing when I was 23, nor even 27, it is just funny how when you try something your opinion changes. 

With that being said, this new generation is putting a picket fence over what they hold to be valuable to themselves over what they believe their family and conditioned society holds to be honorous. They may forgo debt to go on that “brat summer” trip to Italy while working at the local third-wave coffee shop, but they will come back home knowing that if they take on a few more shifts, sell that Chrome Hearts hoodie and out-of-fashion Yeezys that they can take on that Affirm payment.

Boomers love the availability and ease of their jobs that they built lives on. They are the backbone of the country today and most of their kids and grandkids are riding on their coattails. Yet, there is a part of them that loves the old school working mentality— drive to work listening to sports talk radio, go to work, clock in, make a coffee laden with fake French vanilla creamer and Splenda, spend the first hour frolicking through emails, do some work periodically before lunch, think about lunch, go to Fuddruckers, come back in a coma, have another coffee, sit through a meeting, have a snack, then go home, turn on the telly and call it day. This reality can be a Truman’s Show life until you’re 75, hitting Social Security, pre-diabetic and decrepit, only looking forward to reliving your college football years on Saturdays and yelling “Go Pack Go!” on Sundays amidst a 3 p.m. Bud Light haze.

Is that life? To some, that sounds great, to the new generation, wellness and having time to pursue creative goals and lifelong pursuits is the dream. Work is just a conduit to building the life you want, and it is tough, but once you find it, hold onto it, because so many people are going through the rat race, both educated, and some just coming to America on the coat-tails of dreams and stories they heard in their countries—only to create their version of the American dream. 

2. Recipe of the Week: Red Polenta Waffles with Caviar and Bordier Butter (a la Leopardo)

As an avid home cook, inspiration comes from a myriad of different sources: magazines, YouTube clips, travel food shows, and cookbooks, but I find that the multi-sensory "a ha" moments come when you eat a revelatory dish in person.

At a recent meal at Leopardo, Josh Skenes (former chef at Saison and Angler) new LA hotspot, chef Skenes is putting his riff on pizzas, game meats, and grilled seafood with the same detail that made his previous restaurants a hit, albeit to a more casual degree. One such spin on one of his signature dishes—the banana pancake with caviar, is his Red Flint Polenta waffles with barbecue corn-cob maple syrup, Bordier butter, and caviar. Tying back to the "Breakfast for Dinner" article, this is one of the few "fine dining" breakfast dishes you can get in town, and its popularity has single-handedly made them start a breakfast/lunch service. 

I love waffles a tad more than pancakes because of the architectural nature of food—its ridges are the perfect truss to take in syrup and melted butter. I immediately thought of ways I could make this at home and came up with this recipe:

Note: Red flint polenta is the creme de la creme of polentas and has a more nutty flavor than regular polenta. Think of the difference in taste between black rice and plain white rice. I used plain polenta for this recipe.

Waffles:

1 18 oz. package of pre-cooked polenta

1 cup oat flour (160 g rolled oats blended works)

1 teaspoon baking powder & soda 

2 eggs (room temp) 

2 egg whites  (stiffened to a firm peak)

1/4 teaspoon cinnamon 

3 scoops of unflavored or vanilla protein powder 

1/2 cup buttermilk 

1/2 cup Fairlife milk 

4 tablespoons  ghee (melted 1 teaspoon vanilla extract

Instructions:

Mix wet and dry in a blender at a low speed (between 2-5) for a minute.

Transfer to a greased waffle iron.

Cook for 2-3 minutes a side.

Barbecue Corn Maple Syrup:

This is an old Appalachian-style way to make a maple syrup adjacent sauce. Essentially it is taking the water of a few cobs of boiled corn, adding brown sugar to it, and letting it simmer. You can substitute this with sorghum syrup for a similar flavor or do what I did:

2 cans of corn

¼ cup of peach vinegar (or coconut vinegar, NOT ACV)

1 teaspoon BBQ seasoning

1 cup of Monkfruit Syrup

Instructions:

Take the water from 2-3 cans of corn and add the peach vinegar to the water.

Add in the BBQ seasoning and 1 cup of the zero-calorie syrup.

Simmer on low for 15 minutes.

Refrigerate for at least an hour. 

Notes on Serving:

Bordier butter and caviar are more readily accessible than you may think Both are available at Whole Foods. I have tried the Osetras, Petrossians of the world but this is my go-to caviar that I like sneaking into restaurants:'

The butter in the picture rivals good French butter, but there is a vegan butter made by Myokos that honestly spreads better and tastes better than most dairy counterparts.

Finished product.

3. Best Thing I Ate: Tinned Fish Cornucopia

Part of the allure of a good omakase meal is trying out all of the different types of fish. Yet, around the fourth piece of nigiri, your palate doesn’t know the difference between the Osaka Grand Central Market Nodoguru and the bluefin tuna O-toro. Masked between the ambiguous paintbrush of soy sauce (you’re getting Kikkoman at some “Michelin” places hate to break it to you) and a Snickers-mini-sized bed of rice the fish is perched on, the bites all start tasting the same.

@lasvegasfillIto $400 Omakase on the top floor of Fontainebleau is a wonderful dining experience in Vegas! #lasvegas #sushi #omakase

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The same goes with the modern tasting menu— they play their tropes. Duck belly main, caviar with foam iteration somewhere in between, a kid’s finger-sized slice of beef, more foam with white asparagus, a granita palate cleanser, bread and butter, and recycled wine pairings from their cellar that they cannot get rid (or even want to drink themselves). Next thing you know you’re down 300+ dollars and heading home to see if you can grab a torta or some tacos from a truck, something with sustenance. 

Not to poo poo either type of establishment, and *rant over*. I still love the general overall experience of both of these places and appreciate the hard work and meticulous nature of each dish, but if you want a true tasting experience opt for a tinned fish night.

The rules are simple— everyone attending must bring a can of premium tinned fish (and a bottle of wine doesn’t hurt either). Toast some sourdough or bring along some crackers, make some appetizers, salads, and enjoy.

This Tuesday me and some friends had one of these nights and our spread consisted of horse mackerel, smoked salmon, mussels, herring, and salted cod. Each bite had more complex notes and tasted fresher than the past few omakase meals I went to (and these places were heavy hitters).

I paired it with drinks that I curated myself, and to circumvent the sodium overload, we made Caprese salads with the season’s best tomatoes, potatas bravas (because potassium), and even had some Doner-style bison kebabs. I’ll remember that spread 9/10 more often than these derivative, “AI-generated” spots that pop up nowadays.

4. Best Thing(s) I Drank: Calamansi Fruited IPA & A Tried and True Amaro Dating Back to 1875.

#SupportLocal Always. 

Las Vegas' craft beer scene is pretty underrated in my opinion. In a town full of gold-rimmed espresso martinis, dildo-looking frozen beach drinks, and the like, brewers here are doing the most with the resources that are around them. One such beer that blew me away was this Jackass Flats fruited IPA. I was always a Sunkist or Dr. Pepper guy (why I love Amaros) if I had to pick a soda, and this certainly is like a hoppy version of a Sunkist without being too sour or sweet like a seltzer. Very refreshing, and the notes of Calamansi mango give you that orange Starburst-like aftertaste.

Tracked down this bad boy to add to my Amaro collection. No BS additives or sugars added just straight orange peel macerations with anise clove, gentian, chinchona bark, and Alpine herbs. On the rocks or with lemon and a good single-barrel whiskey for an Old Fashioned. Who knew Robitussin tasted so good (and good for your tummy)?

5. The 28 Best Albums of the Year (So Far):

So next week I am doing my top restaurants in America list, and I wanted to pre-cursor that with this list. These are in no order, and as witnessed by my Spotify numbers, (over 4 hours a day listening average), I consume and scavenge new music front and back. I’m sure I missed something, but without further ado:

1. State Faults - Children of the Moon

2. Knocked Loose - You Won't Go Before You're Supposed To

3. Vegyn - The Road to Hell Is Paved With Good Intentions

4. Brittany Howard - What Now

5. Cassandra Jenkins - My Light, My Destroyer

6. Mach-Hommy - RICHAXXHAITIAN

7. Hovvdy: S/T

8. Tems - Born in the Wild

9. Rapsody - Please Don’t Cry

10. Ulcerate - Cutting the Throat of God

11. Mount Kimbie - The Sunset Violent

12. The Smile - Wall of Eyes

13. Infant Island - Obsidian Wreath

14. Frail Body - Artificial Bouquet 

15. Sturgill Simpson - Passage du Desir

16. Mannequin Pussy - I Got Heaven

17. Sega Bodega - Dennis

18. Logic1000 - Mother

19. NxWrries - Why Lawd?

20. Zach Bryan  - The Great American Bar Scene

21. Kings of Leon - Can We Please Have Fun

22. Iglooghost - Tidal Memory Exo

23. Idles - Tangk

24. Charli XCX - Brat

25. Waxahatchee - Tiger’s Blood

26. Arooj Aftab - Night Reign

27. Reyna Tropical - Malegria

28. Ghostly Kisses - Darkroom

EPs: 

Bicep, Softcult,, King Krule, Tove Lo/SG Lewis, Nourished by Time, Amaarae, & Agriculture

6. Songs of the Week: